My inbox gets flooded as early as August with frantic messages from people who are dying to know what’s going to be on the Elisse Miller holiday gift guide this year. Not to mention, the truckloads of PR packages I get throughout the year from companies desperate to achieve a spot on the coveted Oprah’s Elisse’s Favorite Things List.

My gifting philosophy is simple and probably very similar to your own since you stumbled into my internet echo chamber–Shop local first and shop small second. Consumable gifts are fantastic in reducing waste. Avoid Amazon at all costs.

Are the people in your life not explicit about their true desires? Do you trust my taste? Are you buying me a gift? Then this is the post for you.

Gifts to eat (or eat with)

Handy Dandy Brandy charcuterie boards

These pieces of art will be the most fun item you have in your kitchen. Playful and somehow still sophisticated (maybe because of the gorgeous wood), these cutting/charcuterie boards will yield plenty of “oohs” and “aahs” at your next party. Bonus: They’re available at my favorite store in San Diego, Home Ec.

Brightland olive oil

High-quality olive oil is a cross-section of luxury and nourishment, which I think is true self-care. Brightland oils are made from “olives from a family-run California farm” and the company was founded by an Indian woman. I’ve gone through multiple bottles and can confirm they’re outright delicious and make mundane meals feel special.

Las Jaras wine

During the pandemic, when going to the bar was a distant memory, I shifted my vodka soda funds into buying nicer bottles of wine. It made another night stuck inside feel like an occasion. This is when I discovered and fell in love with Eric Wareheim’s (stay with me) Las Jaras Wines. Glou glou may be my favorite wine of all time, though I don’t think it’s available anymore (sorry!!). I’ve genuinely enjoyed every wine of theirs that I’ve tried, so you really can’t miss. Locally, you can find them at Vino Carta, Bottlecraft, and Clo’s Wine Shop.

Foxtrot gift boxes

It’s simple: delicious foods in delightful packaging that you can’t easily find in stores. Good ingredients from small businesses are guaranteed in every box that’s lovingly curated and packaged. I’ve got my eyes on the Snaxshot collab (a wonderful food newsletter) with drool-worthy dips and spreads.

Great Jones Dutch Baby

If you don’t already own a dutch oven, you’re missing out on a versatile little fellow. We cook pasta, make soup, and bake bread with ours on a near weekly basis. It really doesn’t get more stylish than the one from Great Jones in Taffy. As someone who doesn’t eat meat, I’ve never needed one larger than 3.5 quarts, plus the smaller size will save you a couple bucks in the end.

Gifts to wear

Dauphinette jewelry

Perfect for your whimsical friend who constantly posts about their cottagecore fantasies. Dauphinette takes objects from nature (flowers, nuts, fruits, butterflies, etc.), casts them in resin (and sometimes gold), then fashions them into all types of jewelry. Totally one of a kind and a beautiful celebration of the earth. I’ve had my eye on the chili pepper earrings for a while now.

Georgia Perry reusable shopping bags

Yes, it’s hard to make this recommendation now that we all know tote bags are an ecological scam. But I present this counter argument–LOOK HOW CUTE THESE ARE. Okay, but actually these are made of 100% recycled plastic, which feels like a justifiable purchase. Warning: these ship from Australia so buy now.

ARQ lounge set

We’ve all bought matching bra and underwear sets in hopes of looking and feeling like a person who really has their shit together, only to wear the items separately or not at all. I promise that won’t be the case here, simply because once you’ve put these on, you will not take them off. Ever! The cotton and seaming are so soft and snuggly, it’s hard to go back to any other type of intimate wear. Same goes for the leotards. You won’t want to hide them under normal clothes either, so do as I do and wear a set (or leo) at home as loungewear. Pro tip: their anniversary sale is on November 16.

Wear Your Snacks clothes

Fashion from the 00s is back in a big way, but graphic tees with cheeky (or downright rude) slogans haven’t quite hit the mainstream again. In their place though may be the irreverent food-based shirt that simultaneously attempts to foster community (Katie Kimmel) and elitism (Molly Baz) based on the food item you’re championing. Here, I recommend Wear Your Snacks, a one-woman show that sells a “TIMOTHÉE CHARDONNAY” shirt. Nothing else to say!

Girlfriend Collective ReSlides

Nothing says California Christmas like gifting a pair of sandals. Made from “a blend of recycled, scrap, and bio-based material in a zero waste process”, these shoes are recyclable at the end of their life via Girlfriend’s ReGirlfriend program. We know that comfort-centric dressing is here to stay post-pandemic, so I can easily see these sliding into most people’s wardrobes.

Gifts to luxuriate in

ROZ SANTA LUCIA styling oil

Oils have been a symbol of luxury for literally millennia! Which is why my favorite pampering technique is to douse myself in the stuff, from scalp to foot. This hair oil was created by celebrity hair stylist Mara Roszak and was made to be lightweight enough for daily use, something critical for a thin-haired gal like me. Really, all that I need to say is that this product has been used on Cara Delevigne, Hailey Bieber, and Kate Mara.

Osea Undaria Algae body oil

More! Oils! More! Fancy! Grease! Slather this stuff into your skin as soon as you get out of the shower and I promise you will feel like be that bitch all day. It smells and feels incredible, but more than the product itself, it just feels nice to spend a couple extra minutes in touch (literally) with your body and care for yourself.

Boy Smells Future Classics holiday votive set

It’s time to start buying expensive candles. No more Home Goods, no more Bath & Body Works. I deserve better. You deserve better. I came to this conclusion when I ordered my first Boy Smells candle. They’re the most fragrant and most unique candles I’ve come across. Simply setting them, unlit, in a room will produce enough fragrance to improve your mood when you walk by. I’m recommending their holiday set here, but you can’t go wrong with any of the scents that intrigue you.

Gifts to look at

An underrated gift is art. There are so many creators out there that the gift of a print is likely to introduce the recipient to a new artist and their respective universe. The definition of a gift that keeps on giving! Here are a few of my current faves and their print shops.

Featured photo by Eugene Zhyvchik on Unsplash

A few years ago, I committed to never again buy new clothes. My goal is to buy all clothing, jewelry, shoes, handbags, etc. secondhand. The human rights abuses and ecologocial devastation connected to fast fashion is well documented, and I found it increasingly difficult to ignore. Of course, I haven’t been able to execute this aspiration 100% (hello, underwear), but personal goals are about growth, not being perfect.

Thanks to The Internet^TM, this goal has been relatively easy to achieve. The amount of vintage sellers on Instagram has absolutely skyrocketed recently. Additionally, thousands of new items are being uploaded to apps like Depop, Poshmark, and ThredUp every day.

But here’s the problem: Most of us are used to one very specific way of shopping. You walk into a store, try things on, buy them, and leave. Or, my favorite tactic, buy item on sight, try it on once you get home, hate it, and get frustrated that you have to go back to the store to return it. But with secondhand clothing, there’s usually no return policy, especially if you’re buying from a small biz online.

This gamble can feel like a huge barrier to entry, but I promise if you tweak your standard shopping practices, you can successfully snag some really cute, well-fitting vintage clothes online. Here’s how.

Grab a tape measure

Misguided body-posi enthusiasts love to regurgitate the “fact” that Marilyn Monroe was actually a size 12. Gasp! If that’s true (it’s not), it’s only because a size 12 in the 50s is not the same as a size 12 now. It’s almost as if those numbers are completely arbitrary. Huh!

All this is to say, if you’re a size Large at most modern stores, you might not be a size Large in a vintage piece. So, we must turn to the more specific and reliable method of knowing your measurements.

But here’s an even better tip than knowing your measurements–know the measurements of your best fitting clothes. If your favorite pair of pants have a 16″ waist and 22″ hips, then make sure any new pairs of pants you buy have similar measurements. It might be helpful to take the measurements of your tightest-fitting clothes too, so you know what measurements you absolutely can’t go under.

Most vintage sellers give thorough sizing info, but just ask if you need to know a certain measurement. Measurements are usually taken while the garment is laid flat, so you can double the number to get the entire body’s measurements. For tops, most sellers give pit-to-pit measurements, which is taken across the bust from armpit seam to armpit seam. For example, a blouse may have a PTP measurement of 13″, which would fit a 26″ inch bust. For bottoms, the measurements will usually be waist, hips (widest part of behind), rise (from crotch to top of waistband), and inseam (from crotch to bottom hem).

Learn the fabric facts

If you measure a current pair of jeans that have 10% elastane and compare them to a vintage pair of jeans that are 100% cotton, you’re going to be disappointed when the vintage pair doesn’t zip up all the way. You may also be disappointed when you sweat through your thick polyester 70s caftan, not realizing it is such an unbreathable fabric.

Not only is paying attention to fabric critical for fit, but it can also help determine comfort. As with the measurement process, notice what pieces you own and love, and look for those same things in the secondhand pieces you consider buying. Once again, just ask the seller about the fabric if it’s not explicitly stated. Fabrics and textures can be difficult to photograph and therefore can be easily misinterpreted while scroll shopping.

Oh, and are you really going to take that dry-clean-only dress to the cleaners? If not, you should probably pass on it.

Visit your local tailor

Regularly taking clothes to the tailor is my favorite discovery of being a Real Adult^TM. You may have diligently measured every inch, but still wind up with a garment that doesn’t fit you perfectly. Or hell, it may fit, but it’s just not flattering your specific shape. I once took a blazer to the tailor and said “I’m not sure what needs to be done, but it just doesn’t look right.” And after pins were applied in a flurry, I took a step back and noticed the jacket looked, well, tailored.

The more vintage clothing I buy, the more I realize it was designed exclusively for one body type–thin and straight. My proportions are curvier, so if a pair of vintage pants fits my hips, it doesn’t fit my waist. That’s when I head to the tailor and walk away with a piece that looks and feels good.

Another one of their superpowers is fixing hems, buttons, fasteners, whatever, that have been damaged or decayed over time. Vintage items are usually much sturdier than modern clothing and therefore can take mending rather well.

Paying an additional fee on top of the price of the garment does suck. But the result of the investment, aka the dress you now look super hot in, means you’ll wear the piece more often, therefore increasing its value over time.

Fall in love with your purchase

Fast fashion capitalizes on a lot of toxic shopping habits to be monsterously successful. One of these key elements is just how freakin’ easy it is. You go to Zara.com, you click on the latest arrivals, select size Large on the trendy top you saw an influencer wear, add to cart, check out, and open the package days later. By design, there is so little friction in this process.

The opposite can happen when you shop vintage. You have to take time to look at the piece, lovingly consider measurements, imagine what to pair with it, and generally mull things over. This can ensure that you truly love a garment and will wear it with joy countless times, instead of buying a flimsy shirt from Forever 21 that you wear once and then never revisit because you realize too late that you don’t actually like it all that much!

Soon you’ll have a closet full of beloved vintage items that you wear often and with confidence.

Photo by Becca McHaffie on Unsplash

With the clouds of the pandemic slowly starting to lift from the skies of the U.S., I’ve been forced to confront the fact that soon people will actually see me. My corporeal form. IRL. Not on Zoom. Including my clothing.

This has led to frantic examinations of my closet, wondering if I even remember how to dress myself for the public eye. It’s a rude awakening we’re all navigating.

And while some areas of my closet grew in the pandemic (e.g. athletic wear and anything with a stretch waistband), no corner of my dresser went as untouched as my swimsuits. A genre of wear that TRULY had no reason to exist in the past year as 1. I don’t have a pool and 2. the pics of crowded beaches over the summer left me with a grip of anxiety.

Which is maybe why over the past few weeks I’ve been looking at bikinis online in a frenzied state. Countless tabs open. Tape measure tangled around my frame. Sore fingers from typing and retyping my credit card info.

It’s been years since I’ve bought a bathing suit, so I was pretty out of touch with what’s even out there, especially in the eco-friendly market. So I figured I’d pass along the results of my hours of research. Now to find matching face masks…

Vitamin A

California brand Vitamin A gets a coveted “Great” rating from good on you for its use of recycled nylon in its undeniably sexy pieces. There is a strong sense of California cool and confidence embedded in every swimsuit that makes them irresistible. What makes them resistible then? The price can be steep, especially when compared to other options on this list. My advice is to splurge on a timeless black two-piece you know you’ll wear for years to come and look crazy hot in.

Ookioh

A lot stands out about Ookioh. Its commitment to using 100% recycled materials makes your eyes go wide when other “green” brands only use a percentage recycled materials. But what’s even more surprising is its diverse style offerings that cover a wide range of aesthetics. There are itty bitty string bikinis, full coverage one pieces, 60s-inspired halter tops, athletic-cut takinis, nautical stripes, and still so much more. With a competitive price of about $50 per piece (or $100 for a one piece), I truly believe anyone can find something they enjoy in this shop.

Saltwater Collective

This brand may just have it all: trendy styles, 100% regenerated Econyl nylon fabric, and a healthy dose of body positivity. The size representation in this shop is a major win—sustainability is no good if it isn’t accessible. People with big bodies deserve the same sexy, sustainable swimwear options as everyone else. The only downside is that these pieces get snatched up quickly, understandably so. Personally, I’m on the waiting list for more than one item…

La Donna Swim

While this is a newer brand, there is already a lot of promise in its offerings. Not only are suits made from recycled plastic bottles, but the brand is also committed to “ a made-to-order structure in efforts to reduce waste.” Stock surplus is notoriously an issue in fashion, with some brands literally burning their excess clothing. As of this publish date, the store is having a big sale, making this the most affordable option.

Good ol’ thrifting

For the most part, the above brands focus on the recycle part of “reduce, reuse, recycle.” But a huge opportunity for reusing comes from the wonderful world of thrifting. Brick and mortar secondhand stores aren’t typically a treasure trove of bathing suits, but thankfully there are so many digital options to buy secondhand. Poshmark, Depop, and ThredUp host a wealth of swimwear options which can help make things easier on your wallet, too. Here’s my tip: if you already have a swimsuit that you love but just want a fresher style, search for “[Brand name] swimsuit”, apply a filter for your size, and bam! You’ll (hopefully) have pages of options that you know you’ll look fantastic in without damaging the earth with a brand new purchase.

I have a habit (I didn’t say bad habit–this is a judgment-free zone of course) of reacting, out loud, to podcasts. This isn’t limited to just laughing. Often times it’s full sentences, as if I’m actually apart of this recorded conversation.

“Oh my god STOP!”

“I believe it!”

“How could you not?”

I’ve always had a penchant for talking to a nonexistent audience, but I have to imagine the current coronavirus pandemic has only exacerbated this, as irl interactions with my actual friends have plummeted.

However, I also think this speaks to the quality and genre of podcasts I’m drawn to: conversational, minimal production, and usually co-hosted by real life friends. If I’m so affected that I subconsciously talk back to the hosts, then it’s a damn good show. Here are a few of my recent favs.

Add to Cart

I came to this podcast as a fan of co-host Kulap Vilaysack and her past comedic work. And while I was unfamiliar with co-host SuChin Pak, the friendship between these two is so apparently strong, and therefore extremely alluring to me. The premise (though I don’t care if they stick to it–I would gleefully eavesdrop on any of their conversations) is that they discuss what they’re buying and what they’re not buying in any given week. It sounds like peak consumerism, but in reality it reveals a lot about what desires capitalism manufactures in women, and what it takes for us to say no (or yes) to those desires–in this show, both are valid. Also, that’s a rather deep explanation of a podcast that is simply very funny.

Poog

If any of the above themes mildly appeal to you, then you’ll also be a sucker for Poog. Co-hosts Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak are set equally on debunking and lionizing all things beauty and wellness. In the same breath, they worship the 10-step Korean skincare regimen and also suggest a less is more approach is best for your skin. I think all millennial women can relate to putting all your eggs in the basket of wellness while also decrying it all as snake oil made by the patriarchy. Again, this show is simply very funny.

Best Friends

Consider this show your weekly reminder to call or text your best friend(s). Co-hosts Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata more or less upload their usual conversations to the internet–it’s that authentic and unfiltered. It’s a treat (to use one of Nicole’s favorite words) that makes me full-belly chuckle at least once per episode. Recounting mundane events of the week can lead to winding, playful discussions about how exactly chickens lay eggs or how growing tomatoes can make you cry. I’ll also note that this is one of the few pieces of media that I tolerate discussing the pandemic. It’s comforting to hear other women talk freely about how they’re holding up (or not).

Threedom

This is the cure for what ails you when it comes to the bleakness, anxiety and depression of the pandemic. Threedom is pure silliness from three of the most entertaining improvisers in LA: Paul F. Tompkins, Scott Aukerman, and Lauren Lapkus. I won’t waste your time by attempting to explain any of the ongoing bits. In the most recent episodes, they’ve been tasting and ranking M&M flavors, and I can’t really recall why. Come for the off-the-cuff recounting of working in Hollywood, stay for the nonsensical improv games played at the end of each episode.

Bitch Sesh

This podcast is a weekly recap of The Real Housewives shows, and I don’t watch any of the Real Housewives shows. That’s it, that’s the review! If I can commit to two women talking about people and scenarios I have no real context for, then it must be a good time. Co-hosts Casey Wilson and Danielle Schneider would make the encyclopedia audiobook a riot.